By Mayo Clinic staff
Before treatment or recovery, most people with alcoholism deny that they have a drinking problem. Other signs of alcoholism and alcohol abuse include:
Drinking alone or in secret
Being unable to limit the amount of alcohol you drink
Not remembering conversations or commitments, sometimes referred to as "blacking out"
Making a ritual of having drinks before, with or after dinner and becoming annoyed when this ritual is disturbed or questioned
Losing interest in activities and hobbies that used to bring pleasure
Feeling a need or compulsion to drink
Irritability when your usual drinking time nears, especially if alcohol isn't available
Keeping alcohol in unlikely places at home, at work or in the car
Gulping drinks, ordering doubles, becoming intoxicated intentionally to feel good or drinking to feel "normal"
Having legal problems or problems with relationships, employment or finances
Building a tolerance to alcohol so that you need an increasing number of drinks to feel alcohol's effects
Experiencing physical withdrawal symptoms — such as nausea, sweating and shaking — if you don't drink
People who abuse alcohol may experience many of the same signs and symptoms as people who are dependent on alcohol. However, alcohol abusers don't feel the same compulsion to drink and usually don't experience physical withdrawal symptoms when they don't drink. A dependence on alcohol also creates a tolerance to alcohol and the inability to control your drinking.
If you've ever wondered if your own alcohol consumption crosses the line of abuse or dependence, ask yourself these questions:
Do you need a drink as soon as you get up?
Do you feel guilty about your drinking?
Do you think you need to cut back on your alcohol consumption?
Are you annoyed when other people comment on or criticize your drinking habits?
If you answered yes to two or more questions, it's likely that you have a problem with alcohol. Even one yes answer may indicate a problem.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Aren't you cured yet?
The first few years of my sobriety, in order to protect it, I pretty much stayed with in the confines of AA. I had a job and all that, but I pretty much restricted my social life to the fellowship of AA and those people in recovery. If I dated a civilian, I made sure she understood my situation up front. I didn’t make a big issue out of it. I wanted her to know so we could avoid any embarrassing situations for her. If we were in a situation where I was offered an alcoholic drink, I would politely say no thank you. If pressed, I would just say I don’t drink and drive and asked that she would just agree with my answer.
If I happened to be at a family function, they would automatically offer me a soft drink. Since they were well aware of my condition, I guess they did not want to put me in the situation of having to choose. I also think that did not know what to do or say if I accepted their offer of an alcoholic drink. There were times I was offended by their actions. I know they had my best interest at heart, but I would have preferred being treated as a normal human being and been given the opportunity to say no thank you. God knows there were certainly other family members around that should have been offered a soft drink as well.
So other than me getting occasionally upset for not being given the no thanks option, there was little fanfare regarding me being an alcoholic. Outside of my friends in AA I don’t think most people understood it. The ones that knew me drunk were happy that I didn’t drink anymore and left it at that. Others came to accept the fact that I just didn’t drink. By the way, all this was fine by me. It was until later on in my sobriety did people start asking if I was cured yet.
The more comfortable I was with my sobriety and myself the more I was willing to share the fact that I was a recovery alcoholic. These disclosures by me were done in the context of an appropriate situation or conversation. It was not something I was shouting from the rooftops for all to hear. After hearing the amount of time I had sober, people were surprised to learn that I still did not drink. I would get comments like, “After all these years why can’t you have just one?” “After all this time and experience in AA, shouldn’t you be able control it.” The easiest way for me to explain why was to compare alcoholism to any other disease or allergy without a cure. For example, if you know someone will have a as a severe allergic reaction to peanuts you don’t offered them a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and then why they can’t just have just one, when they say no thank you.
I guess I must be into the third phase of my public sobriety. Now people who are unaware of my situation will just make some comment like, “Oh you don’t drink.” and when I respond, “No I don’t.” The usual response is, “Really, Nothing at all!” And I respond, “No nothing.” Generally it ends there. I don’t hide the fact that I’m a recovering alcoholic, but unless there is some relevance to my disclosing that fact, I leave just as it is. With a polite and confident, No Thank You. Even if I end up revealing my alcoholism, no one seems to inquire if I cured yet. I can only hope we have a more educated society regarding addiction and substance. I would hate to think that the society as a whole as become that apathetic and no one cares enough to asked whether I’m cured or not.
If I happened to be at a family function, they would automatically offer me a soft drink. Since they were well aware of my condition, I guess they did not want to put me in the situation of having to choose. I also think that did not know what to do or say if I accepted their offer of an alcoholic drink. There were times I was offended by their actions. I know they had my best interest at heart, but I would have preferred being treated as a normal human being and been given the opportunity to say no thank you. God knows there were certainly other family members around that should have been offered a soft drink as well.
So other than me getting occasionally upset for not being given the no thanks option, there was little fanfare regarding me being an alcoholic. Outside of my friends in AA I don’t think most people understood it. The ones that knew me drunk were happy that I didn’t drink anymore and left it at that. Others came to accept the fact that I just didn’t drink. By the way, all this was fine by me. It was until later on in my sobriety did people start asking if I was cured yet.
The more comfortable I was with my sobriety and myself the more I was willing to share the fact that I was a recovery alcoholic. These disclosures by me were done in the context of an appropriate situation or conversation. It was not something I was shouting from the rooftops for all to hear. After hearing the amount of time I had sober, people were surprised to learn that I still did not drink. I would get comments like, “After all these years why can’t you have just one?” “After all this time and experience in AA, shouldn’t you be able control it.” The easiest way for me to explain why was to compare alcoholism to any other disease or allergy without a cure. For example, if you know someone will have a as a severe allergic reaction to peanuts you don’t offered them a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and then why they can’t just have just one, when they say no thank you.
I guess I must be into the third phase of my public sobriety. Now people who are unaware of my situation will just make some comment like, “Oh you don’t drink.” and when I respond, “No I don’t.” The usual response is, “Really, Nothing at all!” And I respond, “No nothing.” Generally it ends there. I don’t hide the fact that I’m a recovering alcoholic, but unless there is some relevance to my disclosing that fact, I leave just as it is. With a polite and confident, No Thank You. Even if I end up revealing my alcoholism, no one seems to inquire if I cured yet. I can only hope we have a more educated society regarding addiction and substance. I would hate to think that the society as a whole as become that apathetic and no one cares enough to asked whether I’m cured or not.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Who are these people and why are they smiling?
When I first starting attending AA meetings I did not understand why these people appeared to be so happy. I certainly didn’t see anything to be joyful about. My life was a mess and my future was dismal at best. My only consolation was drinking and now I was being told that I couldn’t do that anymore either. Of course they emphasized it was just for one day at a time. Like that was some consolation to me. Forever was forever regardless of how you said it. So, if what they told me was true and they were just like me; which I doubted by the way, who were these people and why were they smiling?
Since I was such a genius at this point, there were only two logical answers. One, they were happy just to be out of the house and away from the nagging spouse at home. And two, from all the meetings they were attending they learned how to successfully control their drinking. All this was fine with me, because being able to drink successfully again was all that I was looking for as well.
It was only after a few months of sobriety that I came to realize that my initial assumptions were all wrong. They were smiling, not because they found a way to drink successfully, but rather that they could live successfully without drinking. All the things I was desperately trying find by drinking I found by not drinking. In AA I was accepted because of who I was and not rejected because of what I was. When I told these people what I was experiencing they understood completely because they had been there themselves. I was discovering the true meaning of fellowship in AA.
I’m sure you’ll agree that it’s a nice feeling to go somewhere where people know you and are truly glad to see you. Even after 35+ years it still works for me.
Since I was such a genius at this point, there were only two logical answers. One, they were happy just to be out of the house and away from the nagging spouse at home. And two, from all the meetings they were attending they learned how to successfully control their drinking. All this was fine with me, because being able to drink successfully again was all that I was looking for as well.
It was only after a few months of sobriety that I came to realize that my initial assumptions were all wrong. They were smiling, not because they found a way to drink successfully, but rather that they could live successfully without drinking. All the things I was desperately trying find by drinking I found by not drinking. In AA I was accepted because of who I was and not rejected because of what I was. When I told these people what I was experiencing they understood completely because they had been there themselves. I was discovering the true meaning of fellowship in AA.
I’m sure you’ll agree that it’s a nice feeling to go somewhere where people know you and are truly glad to see you. Even after 35+ years it still works for me.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Alcoholics Anonymous, Al-Anon and Alateen
Alcoholics Anonymous
The fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) was formed in 1935. As a self-help group of people recovering from alcoholism, AA offers a sober peer group as an effective model for achieving total abstinence.
The AA program is built around 12 steps, which are straightforward suggestions for people who choose to lead sober lives. As guides to recovery, the 12 steps help those with alcoholism to accept their powerlessness over alcohol. They stress the necessity for honesty about the past and present.
Recovery in AA is based on accepting the unique experience of each person. Through listening and sharing stories, people who abuse or are dependent on alcohol learn they aren't alone. There are no fees for membership or requirements for following the 12 steps - only a willingness to try to remain sober.
Al-Anon and Alateen
Eventually family members of people recovering from alcoholism formed a complementary self-help group called Al-Anon. Al-Anon is designed for people who are affected by someone else's alcoholism. In sharing their stories, they gain a greater understanding of how the disease affects the entire family. Al-Anon accepts the 12 steps of AA as the principles by which participants are to conduct their lives. It also emphasizes the need to learn detachment and forgiveness. In many communities, Alateen groups also are available for teenage children of those with alcoholism.
Your doctor or counselor can refer you to an AA group or other local support group.
These groups are also commonly listed in the phone book, in the local newspaper and on the Web.
The fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) was formed in 1935. As a self-help group of people recovering from alcoholism, AA offers a sober peer group as an effective model for achieving total abstinence.
The AA program is built around 12 steps, which are straightforward suggestions for people who choose to lead sober lives. As guides to recovery, the 12 steps help those with alcoholism to accept their powerlessness over alcohol. They stress the necessity for honesty about the past and present.
Recovery in AA is based on accepting the unique experience of each person. Through listening and sharing stories, people who abuse or are dependent on alcohol learn they aren't alone. There are no fees for membership or requirements for following the 12 steps - only a willingness to try to remain sober.
Al-Anon and Alateen
Eventually family members of people recovering from alcoholism formed a complementary self-help group called Al-Anon. Al-Anon is designed for people who are affected by someone else's alcoholism. In sharing their stories, they gain a greater understanding of how the disease affects the entire family. Al-Anon accepts the 12 steps of AA as the principles by which participants are to conduct their lives. It also emphasizes the need to learn detachment and forgiveness. In many communities, Alateen groups also are available for teenage children of those with alcoholism.
Your doctor or counselor can refer you to an AA group or other local support group.
These groups are also commonly listed in the phone book, in the local newspaper and on the Web.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Self Test for Alcoholism (26 Questions)
By the U.S. National Council on Alcoholism
The first--and often the toughest--step in beating alcoholism is admitting the existence of a problem.
To test whether alcohol is a problem for you, answer "YES" or "NO" to this series of questions.
1. Do you occasionally drink heavily after a disappointment, quarrel or rough day?
YES NO
2. When under pressure, do you always drink more heavily than usual?
YES NO
3. Can you handle more liquor now than when you first started drinking?
YES NO
4. On the "morning after," have you been unable to remember part of the evening before--even though friends say you didn't pass out?
YES NO
5. When drinking with others, do you try to have a few extra drinks when they won't know it?
YES NO
6. Are there certain occasions when you feel uncomfortable if alcohol is not available?
YES NO
7. When you start drinking, are you in more of a hurry to get the first drink than you used to be?
YES NO
8. Do you sometimes feel a little guilty about your drinking?
YES NO
9. Are you secretly irritated when friends or family discuss your drinking?
YES NO
10. Have you experienced memory blackouts more frequently?
YES NO
11. Do you often want to drink more after friends have had enough?
YES NO
12. Do you usually have a reason for occasions when you drink heavily?
YES NO
13. When sober, do you often regret things you've done or said while drinking?
YES NO
14. Have you tried to control your drinking by switching Brands or following different plans?
YES NO
15. Have you often failed to keep promises about controlling your drinking?
YES NO
16. Have you tried to control your drinking by changing jobs or moving?
YES NO
17. Do you try to avoid family or friends while drinking?
YES NO
18. Are you having an increasing number of financial and work problems?
YES NO
19. Do more people seem to be treating you unfairly without reason?
YES NO
20. Do you eat very little or irregularly when drinking?
YES NO
21. Do you sometimes have the morning "shakes" and relieve them with a drink?
YES NO
22. Are you unable to drink as much as you once did?
YES NO
23. Do you sometimes stay drunk for several days at a time?
YES NO
24. Do you sometimes feel very depressed and wonder whether life is worth living?
YES NO
25. After drinking, do you ever see or hear things that aren't there?
YES NO
26. Do you get terribly frightened after drinking heavily?
YES NO
Did you answer "YES" to any of these questions?
If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, you have some symptoms that may indicate alcoholism.
"Yes" answers to three or more questions in various categories indicate the following stages of alcoholism:
Questions 1 to 8: Early stage.
Questions 9 to 21: Middle stage.
Questions 22 to 26: Beginning of Final stage.
The first--and often the toughest--step in beating alcoholism is admitting the existence of a problem.
To test whether alcohol is a problem for you, answer "YES" or "NO" to this series of questions.
1. Do you occasionally drink heavily after a disappointment, quarrel or rough day?
YES NO
2. When under pressure, do you always drink more heavily than usual?
YES NO
3. Can you handle more liquor now than when you first started drinking?
YES NO
4. On the "morning after," have you been unable to remember part of the evening before--even though friends say you didn't pass out?
YES NO
5. When drinking with others, do you try to have a few extra drinks when they won't know it?
YES NO
6. Are there certain occasions when you feel uncomfortable if alcohol is not available?
YES NO
7. When you start drinking, are you in more of a hurry to get the first drink than you used to be?
YES NO
8. Do you sometimes feel a little guilty about your drinking?
YES NO
9. Are you secretly irritated when friends or family discuss your drinking?
YES NO
10. Have you experienced memory blackouts more frequently?
YES NO
11. Do you often want to drink more after friends have had enough?
YES NO
12. Do you usually have a reason for occasions when you drink heavily?
YES NO
13. When sober, do you often regret things you've done or said while drinking?
YES NO
14. Have you tried to control your drinking by switching Brands or following different plans?
YES NO
15. Have you often failed to keep promises about controlling your drinking?
YES NO
16. Have you tried to control your drinking by changing jobs or moving?
YES NO
17. Do you try to avoid family or friends while drinking?
YES NO
18. Are you having an increasing number of financial and work problems?
YES NO
19. Do more people seem to be treating you unfairly without reason?
YES NO
20. Do you eat very little or irregularly when drinking?
YES NO
21. Do you sometimes have the morning "shakes" and relieve them with a drink?
YES NO
22. Are you unable to drink as much as you once did?
YES NO
23. Do you sometimes stay drunk for several days at a time?
YES NO
24. Do you sometimes feel very depressed and wonder whether life is worth living?
YES NO
25. After drinking, do you ever see or hear things that aren't there?
YES NO
26. Do you get terribly frightened after drinking heavily?
YES NO
Did you answer "YES" to any of these questions?
If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, you have some symptoms that may indicate alcoholism.
"Yes" answers to three or more questions in various categories indicate the following stages of alcoholism:
Questions 1 to 8: Early stage.
Questions 9 to 21: Middle stage.
Questions 22 to 26: Beginning of Final stage.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Dangers of Teen Drinking
Teens don't just drink. They drink to excess.
More than 8 percent of eighth graders, 16 percent of sophomores, and 24 percent of seniors report recent binge drinking (5+ drinks on the same occasion).
Statistics show that the majority of current teen drinkers got drunk in the previous month. That includes 50 percent of the high school sophomores who drink and 65 percent of the high school seniors who drink.
Underage drinking is linked to injury and risky behavior.
According to the U.S. Surgeon General, about 5,000 kids under 21 die every year as a result of underage drinking – from crashes, homicides, and suicides. Teens that drink also are at risk for a long list of other injuries and potential life-long alcohol abuse. Reducing underage drinking can reduce drinking-related harm.
Brain Development and Alcohol Abuse
•Research indicates that the human brain continues to develop into a person's early 20's, and that exposure of the developing brain to alcohol may have long-lasting effects on intellectual capabilities and may increase the likelihood of alcohol addiction.
•The age when drinking starts affects future drinking problems. For each year that the start of drinking is delayed, the risk of later alcohol dependence is reduced by 14 percent.
Drinking and Driving
•Car crashes are the leading cause of death among people ages 15 to 20. About 1,900 people under 21 die every year from car crashes involving underage drinking.
•Young people are more susceptible to alcohol-induced impairment of their driving skills. Drinking drivers aged 16 to 20 are twice as likely to be involved in a fatal crash as drinking drivers who are 21 or older.
Suicide
•Alcohol use interacts with conditions like depression and stress, and contributes to an estimated 300 teen suicides a year.
•High school students who drink are twice as likely to have seriously considered attempting suicide, as compared to nondrinkers. High school students who binge drink are four times as likely to have attempted suicide, as compared to nondrinkers.
Sexual Behavior
•Current teen drinkers are more than twice as likely to have had sexual intercourse within the past three months than teens who don't drink.
•Higher drinking levels increase the likelihood of sexual activity.
•Adolescents who drink are more likely to engage in risky sexual activities, like having sex with someone they don't know or failing to use birth control.
Other Risks
•Teens who drink alcohol are more likely than nondrinkers to smoke marijuana, use inhalants, or carry a weapon.
•Binge drinking substantially increases the likelihood of these activities.
Academic Performance
•A government study published in 2007 shows a relationship between binge drinking and grades. Approximately two-thirds of students with “mostly A’s” are non-drinkers, while nearly half of the students with “mostly D’s and F’s” report binge drinking. It is not clear, however, whether academic failure leads to drinking, or vice versa.
For further information on the risks of underage alcohol use, visit the Surgeon General’s 2007 Call to Action.
Don't serve alcohol to teens.
It's unsafe. It's illegal. It's irresponsible.
We Don't Serve Teens: A National Campaign to Prevent Underage Drinking
www.DontServeTeens.gov
More than 8 percent of eighth graders, 16 percent of sophomores, and 24 percent of seniors report recent binge drinking (5+ drinks on the same occasion).
Statistics show that the majority of current teen drinkers got drunk in the previous month. That includes 50 percent of the high school sophomores who drink and 65 percent of the high school seniors who drink.
Underage drinking is linked to injury and risky behavior.
According to the U.S. Surgeon General, about 5,000 kids under 21 die every year as a result of underage drinking – from crashes, homicides, and suicides. Teens that drink also are at risk for a long list of other injuries and potential life-long alcohol abuse. Reducing underage drinking can reduce drinking-related harm.
Brain Development and Alcohol Abuse
•Research indicates that the human brain continues to develop into a person's early 20's, and that exposure of the developing brain to alcohol may have long-lasting effects on intellectual capabilities and may increase the likelihood of alcohol addiction.
•The age when drinking starts affects future drinking problems. For each year that the start of drinking is delayed, the risk of later alcohol dependence is reduced by 14 percent.
Drinking and Driving
•Car crashes are the leading cause of death among people ages 15 to 20. About 1,900 people under 21 die every year from car crashes involving underage drinking.
•Young people are more susceptible to alcohol-induced impairment of their driving skills. Drinking drivers aged 16 to 20 are twice as likely to be involved in a fatal crash as drinking drivers who are 21 or older.
Suicide
•Alcohol use interacts with conditions like depression and stress, and contributes to an estimated 300 teen suicides a year.
•High school students who drink are twice as likely to have seriously considered attempting suicide, as compared to nondrinkers. High school students who binge drink are four times as likely to have attempted suicide, as compared to nondrinkers.
Sexual Behavior
•Current teen drinkers are more than twice as likely to have had sexual intercourse within the past three months than teens who don't drink.
•Higher drinking levels increase the likelihood of sexual activity.
•Adolescents who drink are more likely to engage in risky sexual activities, like having sex with someone they don't know or failing to use birth control.
Other Risks
•Teens who drink alcohol are more likely than nondrinkers to smoke marijuana, use inhalants, or carry a weapon.
•Binge drinking substantially increases the likelihood of these activities.
Academic Performance
•A government study published in 2007 shows a relationship between binge drinking and grades. Approximately two-thirds of students with “mostly A’s” are non-drinkers, while nearly half of the students with “mostly D’s and F’s” report binge drinking. It is not clear, however, whether academic failure leads to drinking, or vice versa.
For further information on the risks of underage alcohol use, visit the Surgeon General’s 2007 Call to Action.
Don't serve alcohol to teens.
It's unsafe. It's illegal. It's irresponsible.
We Don't Serve Teens: A National Campaign to Prevent Underage Drinking
www.DontServeTeens.gov
Saturday, October 17, 2009
When a loved one has a problem with alcohol
You may not immediately realize that someone you love has an alcohol problem. It may have started slowly, and your loved one might also have tried to hide the extent of the drinking from you. You might have gotten so used to the drinking that coping with it seems almost normal. It might actually feel normal if there was an alcoholic in the family growing up. The realization that there is something seriously wrong might be too painful to admit. Don’t be ashamed, and you are not alone. Alcoholism affects millions of families, from every socioeconomic status, race and culture. There is help and support available.
Understanding what is involved in recovery
You cannot force someone you love to stop abusing alcohol. As much as you may want to, and as hard as it is seeing the effects, you cannot make someone stop drinking. The final choice is up to them. The right support can help you make positive choices for yourself, and balance encouraging your loved one to get help without losing yourself in the process.
Don’t expect your loved one to be able to quit and stay sober without outside help. Your loved one will need help, support and new coping skills so that he or she will be able to resist cravings in a society where drinking is often glamorized. What’s more, if your loved one has crossed the line from alcohol abuse to alcoholism, she or he has built up a tolerance to alcohol. Withdrawal symptoms can be unpleasant, painful, and even deadly.
Recovery will be an ongoing process. Someone who abused alcohol will not magically be a different person once sober. Alcohol use may have been masking painful feelings that will bubble up to the surface. It also takes time for the body and brain to recover from the effects of alcohol. Learning new coping skills and how to apply them in stressful situations is an ongoing process.
Finding support for yourself
A good place to start looking for support is through local support groups. Al-Anon is a free peer support group for families coping with alcoholism. Listening to others with the same challenges can be a tremendous source of comfort and support. Other sources of help and support include trusted friends, a therapist, or a pastor or rabbi.
Keeping your family safe
Dealing with a loved one’s alcohol abuse can be emotionally draining and exhausting. But when the family is threatened with immediate violence, it’s time for immediate action.
Alcohol abuse can lower inhibitions and increase the possibility of violence. Drinking may also become so important that activities like caring for a child fall by the wayside, increasing the chance of child neglect. Visit Domestic Violence and Abuse and Child Abuse and Neglect for more information on hotlines and how to get help if you or children are being abused.
Starting Down the Road to Recovery
If you are abusing alcohol, even admitting that you may have a problem is a huge step. It takes tremendous strength and courage to admit that you are having trouble. Much as you may want to, don’t try to quit alone. Without the right support, it is very easy to rationalize just one more drink, especially since alcohol is everywhere in our society. The road to sobriety is rewarding but challenging. If you take the time to build a support network and learn your triggers for drinking, you will greatly reduce the risk of relapse.
Understanding what is involved in recovery
You cannot force someone you love to stop abusing alcohol. As much as you may want to, and as hard as it is seeing the effects, you cannot make someone stop drinking. The final choice is up to them. The right support can help you make positive choices for yourself, and balance encouraging your loved one to get help without losing yourself in the process.
Don’t expect your loved one to be able to quit and stay sober without outside help. Your loved one will need help, support and new coping skills so that he or she will be able to resist cravings in a society where drinking is often glamorized. What’s more, if your loved one has crossed the line from alcohol abuse to alcoholism, she or he has built up a tolerance to alcohol. Withdrawal symptoms can be unpleasant, painful, and even deadly.
Recovery will be an ongoing process. Someone who abused alcohol will not magically be a different person once sober. Alcohol use may have been masking painful feelings that will bubble up to the surface. It also takes time for the body and brain to recover from the effects of alcohol. Learning new coping skills and how to apply them in stressful situations is an ongoing process.
Finding support for yourself
A good place to start looking for support is through local support groups. Al-Anon is a free peer support group for families coping with alcoholism. Listening to others with the same challenges can be a tremendous source of comfort and support. Other sources of help and support include trusted friends, a therapist, or a pastor or rabbi.
Keeping your family safe
Dealing with a loved one’s alcohol abuse can be emotionally draining and exhausting. But when the family is threatened with immediate violence, it’s time for immediate action.
Alcohol abuse can lower inhibitions and increase the possibility of violence. Drinking may also become so important that activities like caring for a child fall by the wayside, increasing the chance of child neglect. Visit Domestic Violence and Abuse and Child Abuse and Neglect for more information on hotlines and how to get help if you or children are being abused.
Starting Down the Road to Recovery
If you are abusing alcohol, even admitting that you may have a problem is a huge step. It takes tremendous strength and courage to admit that you are having trouble. Much as you may want to, don’t try to quit alone. Without the right support, it is very easy to rationalize just one more drink, especially since alcohol is everywhere in our society. The road to sobriety is rewarding but challenging. If you take the time to build a support network and learn your triggers for drinking, you will greatly reduce the risk of relapse.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Effects of alcohol abuse
Staying addicted: denial and rationalization
One of the most powerful effects of alcohol abuse and addiction is denial. The urge to drink is so strong that the mind finds many ways to rationalize more drinking. Someone abusing alcohol may drastically underestimate how much they are drinking, how much it is costing them, and how much time it takes away from their family and work. Denial is so powerful that an alcoholic often sincerely believes that there is no problem. They may lash out at concerned family members, so convincingly that family members might feel like they are exaggerating and overstating the problem.
This denial and rationalization can lead to increased problems with work, finances and relationships. The person abusing alcohol may blame an “unfair boss’ for losing her job, or a ‘nagging wife’ for why he is increasingly going out with friends to the bar. While work and relationship stresses happen to everyone, an overall pattern of deterioration and blaming others may be a sign of trouble.
Effects of alcohol abuse on the family
Sadly, alcohol abuse and addiction doesn’t only affect the person abusing alcohol. It affects friends, family and the entire society. Child abuse and neglect is much more common when there is alcohol abuse in the family. The abuser may neglect a child’s basic needs due to drinking. Lack of impulse control can lead to increased physical and emotional abuse. Alcohol abuse by a pregnant woman affects the developing baby’s health. Domestic violence also happens more frequently. Abusing alcohol leads to higher risk of injuries and death to self and others in car accidents.
Family stress
If you have someone you love who drinks too much, it is an enormous emotional strain. You might feel obligated to cover for the alcoholic, cutting back from work to deal with the problems that come up from the drinking— or working more to make financial ends meet. You might not be able to see friends and engage in hobbies, as coping with the abuse takes more and more time. The shame of alcoholism in the family stops many family members from asking for help, instead pretending nothing is wrong. The emotional toll can be overwhelming. Children are especially sensitive.
One of the most powerful effects of alcohol abuse and addiction is denial. The urge to drink is so strong that the mind finds many ways to rationalize more drinking. Someone abusing alcohol may drastically underestimate how much they are drinking, how much it is costing them, and how much time it takes away from their family and work. Denial is so powerful that an alcoholic often sincerely believes that there is no problem. They may lash out at concerned family members, so convincingly that family members might feel like they are exaggerating and overstating the problem.
This denial and rationalization can lead to increased problems with work, finances and relationships. The person abusing alcohol may blame an “unfair boss’ for losing her job, or a ‘nagging wife’ for why he is increasingly going out with friends to the bar. While work and relationship stresses happen to everyone, an overall pattern of deterioration and blaming others may be a sign of trouble.
Effects of alcohol abuse on the family
Sadly, alcohol abuse and addiction doesn’t only affect the person abusing alcohol. It affects friends, family and the entire society. Child abuse and neglect is much more common when there is alcohol abuse in the family. The abuser may neglect a child’s basic needs due to drinking. Lack of impulse control can lead to increased physical and emotional abuse. Alcohol abuse by a pregnant woman affects the developing baby’s health. Domestic violence also happens more frequently. Abusing alcohol leads to higher risk of injuries and death to self and others in car accidents.
Family stress
If you have someone you love who drinks too much, it is an enormous emotional strain. You might feel obligated to cover for the alcoholic, cutting back from work to deal with the problems that come up from the drinking— or working more to make financial ends meet. You might not be able to see friends and engage in hobbies, as coping with the abuse takes more and more time. The shame of alcoholism in the family stops many family members from asking for help, instead pretending nothing is wrong. The emotional toll can be overwhelming. Children are especially sensitive.
Monday, October 12, 2009
What is alcohol abuse?
Social drinking is common and popular is many cultures all over the world. In several cultures, for example, a glass of wine or beer with a meal is common practice. Celebrations are often punctuated with a glass of champagne or other celebratory cocktail. And in many jobs, going out for drinks after work or entertaining clients with alcohol is the norm.
The difference between social drinking and alcohol abuse is when alcohol becomes your focus. You might only want to attend social events that involve alcohol, or you can’t enjoy yourself. Getting to the bar, or making a drink after coming home from work becomes more important than connecting with friends or family. Alcohol might be your way to avoid painful feelings or troubled relationships. And you might resort to dangerous behavior, like driving while drunk or even increased violent behavior. Increased dependence on alcohol leads to alcoholism, where you are physically dependant on alcohol and have lost control of the amount you drink.
Myths about alcohol abuse
Myth: Alcoholics have no will power. If they were stronger they could just stop drinking.
Fact: Alcoholism affects brain chemistry, which causes you to feel compelled to drink alcohol. Usually you can only stop drinking if you receive continuing help and treatment.
Myth: I can’t have a drinking problem. I have control over it because I only drink on the weekends.
Fact: When you abstain from drinking for a certain period of time and then consume a large quantity of alcohol in a very small span of time, this is called binge drinking. It is a common symptom of alcohol abuse.
Myth: I can’t be an alcoholic. I only drink wine or beer.
Fact: While hard liquor is more concentrated, wine or beer will have the same effect. You will just be drinking more of the wine or beer.
Myth: Drinking is not a “real” addiction like drug abuse.
Fact: Alcohol is a drug, and alcohol abuse is every bit as real as drug abuse. Alcohol addiction has serious long term health and legal consequences, and withdrawal can be deadly.
The difference between social drinking and alcohol abuse is when alcohol becomes your focus. You might only want to attend social events that involve alcohol, or you can’t enjoy yourself. Getting to the bar, or making a drink after coming home from work becomes more important than connecting with friends or family. Alcohol might be your way to avoid painful feelings or troubled relationships. And you might resort to dangerous behavior, like driving while drunk or even increased violent behavior. Increased dependence on alcohol leads to alcoholism, where you are physically dependant on alcohol and have lost control of the amount you drink.
Myths about alcohol abuse
Myth: Alcoholics have no will power. If they were stronger they could just stop drinking.
Fact: Alcoholism affects brain chemistry, which causes you to feel compelled to drink alcohol. Usually you can only stop drinking if you receive continuing help and treatment.
Myth: I can’t have a drinking problem. I have control over it because I only drink on the weekends.
Fact: When you abstain from drinking for a certain period of time and then consume a large quantity of alcohol in a very small span of time, this is called binge drinking. It is a common symptom of alcohol abuse.
Myth: I can’t be an alcoholic. I only drink wine or beer.
Fact: While hard liquor is more concentrated, wine or beer will have the same effect. You will just be drinking more of the wine or beer.
Myth: Drinking is not a “real” addiction like drug abuse.
Fact: Alcohol is a drug, and alcohol abuse is every bit as real as drug abuse. Alcohol addiction has serious long term health and legal consequences, and withdrawal can be deadly.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Making Amends – Points to Remember
1. Make a list of all the people harmed by your addiction.
2. Identify what needs to be done to repair the damage.
3. Make a list of all the persons who have harmed you.
4. Forgive the people who have hurt you.
5. Examine the consequences of making amends to discover when doing so would further harm you or others.
6. Develop a strong sobriety program that allows you to maintain sobriety while making amends to others.
7. Develop a plan for when and how to make amends to each person in an effective manner, and review it with your sponsor.
8. Prepare to approach the amends process with an attitude of quiet sincerity.
9. Start making amends by admitting the reality of your addiction and the problem it has caused.
10. Become willing to complete the amends process by paying or making promises to pay whatever obligations are owed.
From the Book Understanding the Twelve Steps, by Terence T. Gorski Copyright 1989
2. Identify what needs to be done to repair the damage.
3. Make a list of all the persons who have harmed you.
4. Forgive the people who have hurt you.
5. Examine the consequences of making amends to discover when doing so would further harm you or others.
6. Develop a strong sobriety program that allows you to maintain sobriety while making amends to others.
7. Develop a plan for when and how to make amends to each person in an effective manner, and review it with your sponsor.
8. Prepare to approach the amends process with an attitude of quiet sincerity.
9. Start making amends by admitting the reality of your addiction and the problem it has caused.
10. Become willing to complete the amends process by paying or making promises to pay whatever obligations are owed.
From the Book Understanding the Twelve Steps, by Terence T. Gorski Copyright 1989
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Making Amends
As I progressed in my sobriety and began sharing my experiences with other alcoholics I came face to face with my past. Like many other individuals with addiction problems, it was not pretty. I was filled with remorse and shame for all the things I had done while drinking. I wasn’t quite sure about being sober and having to deal with all these terrible memories. I was starting to second guess my sobriety. I wasn’t sure how I was going to able live the rest of my life sober carrying around all this guilt.
AA, like others that followed, is based upon a program of Twelve Steps to recovery that act as a guide to sobriety. The first 7 steps deal with internal change and focus on you, the afflicted. Steps 8 and 9 deal with repairing the damage caused your addiction. In Step 8 we are told to make a list of all those we had harmed and become willing to make amends to them all. And in Step 9 we are told to make direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. Well I wasn’t so sure about this. First of all I didn’t think anybody would talk to me, a secondly, to be forgiven, was out of the question.
Fortunately for me, making amends fell into the natural progression of my sobriety. It wasn’t that I was compelled to give out shallow “I’m sorry” to everyone I knew. It was more as the opportunity arose I explained that I was in recovery and that I was willing to make whatever amends that were necessary. It could be an honest but simple I’m sorry to repaying a debt.
For me, getting the opportunity to make amends was a life changing experience. I had been carrying around all this wreckage and the weight of all this guilt was constantly with me. Once I started making amends the burden was finally being lifted. It enabled me to move on and leave the past behind. I didn’t have to be afraid of who I might meet. I didn’t have to hide from myself or anyone else.
AA, like others that followed, is based upon a program of Twelve Steps to recovery that act as a guide to sobriety. The first 7 steps deal with internal change and focus on you, the afflicted. Steps 8 and 9 deal with repairing the damage caused your addiction. In Step 8 we are told to make a list of all those we had harmed and become willing to make amends to them all. And in Step 9 we are told to make direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. Well I wasn’t so sure about this. First of all I didn’t think anybody would talk to me, a secondly, to be forgiven, was out of the question.
Fortunately for me, making amends fell into the natural progression of my sobriety. It wasn’t that I was compelled to give out shallow “I’m sorry” to everyone I knew. It was more as the opportunity arose I explained that I was in recovery and that I was willing to make whatever amends that were necessary. It could be an honest but simple I’m sorry to repaying a debt.
For me, getting the opportunity to make amends was a life changing experience. I had been carrying around all this wreckage and the weight of all this guilt was constantly with me. Once I started making amends the burden was finally being lifted. It enabled me to move on and leave the past behind. I didn’t have to be afraid of who I might meet. I didn’t have to hide from myself or anyone else.
Monday, October 5, 2009
Alcohol: The Short-Term and Long Term Effects
Every year, more money is spent promoting the use of alcohol than any other product. Perhaps through its elaborate and creative marketing, the most basic, yet important fact about alcohol is often overlooked — alcohol is a drug — the most commonly used and widely abused psychoactive drug in the world.
One concept that many people find difficult to accept is that alcoholism and alcohol problems are a disease. Research has shown that alcohol interacts with the body’s systems in predictable ways to lead to physiological addiction.
Alcoholism is a disease — a chronic, progressive, fatal disease if not treated.
Short Term Effects
Even at low doses, alcohol significantly impairs the judgment and coordination required to drive a car or operate machinery safely. Low to moderate doses of alcohol can also increase the incidence of a variety of aggressive acts, including domestic violence and child abuse.
Effects of moderate alcohol intake include dizziness and talkativeness. The immediate effects of a larger amount of alcohol include slurred speech, disturbed sleep, nausea, and vomiting. “Hangovers” are another effect after large amounts of alcohol are consumed — symptoms including headache, nausea, thirst, dizziness, and fatigue.
Long Term Effects
Prolonged, heavy use of alcohol can lead to addiction (alcoholism). Sudden cessation of long term, extensive alcohol intake is likely to produce withdrawal symptoms, including severe anxiety, tremors, hallucinations, and convulsions.
Long-term effects of consuming large quantities of alcohol can lead to:
• permanent damage to vital organs
• several different types of cancer
• gastrointestinal irritations, such as nausea, diarrhea, and ulcers
• malnutrition and nutritional deficiencies
• sexual dysfunctions
• high blood pressure
• lowered resistance to disease
Mothers who drink alcohol during pregnancy may give birth to infants with fetal alcohol syndrome. These infants may suffer from mental retardation and other irreversible physical abnormalities. In addition, research indicates that children of alcoholic parents are at greater risk than other children of becoming alcoholics.
Source: National Institute on Alcohol Abuse & Addiction
One concept that many people find difficult to accept is that alcoholism and alcohol problems are a disease. Research has shown that alcohol interacts with the body’s systems in predictable ways to lead to physiological addiction.
Alcoholism is a disease — a chronic, progressive, fatal disease if not treated.
Short Term Effects
Even at low doses, alcohol significantly impairs the judgment and coordination required to drive a car or operate machinery safely. Low to moderate doses of alcohol can also increase the incidence of a variety of aggressive acts, including domestic violence and child abuse.
Effects of moderate alcohol intake include dizziness and talkativeness. The immediate effects of a larger amount of alcohol include slurred speech, disturbed sleep, nausea, and vomiting. “Hangovers” are another effect after large amounts of alcohol are consumed — symptoms including headache, nausea, thirst, dizziness, and fatigue.
Long Term Effects
Prolonged, heavy use of alcohol can lead to addiction (alcoholism). Sudden cessation of long term, extensive alcohol intake is likely to produce withdrawal symptoms, including severe anxiety, tremors, hallucinations, and convulsions.
Long-term effects of consuming large quantities of alcohol can lead to:
• permanent damage to vital organs
• several different types of cancer
• gastrointestinal irritations, such as nausea, diarrhea, and ulcers
• malnutrition and nutritional deficiencies
• sexual dysfunctions
• high blood pressure
• lowered resistance to disease
Mothers who drink alcohol during pregnancy may give birth to infants with fetal alcohol syndrome. These infants may suffer from mental retardation and other irreversible physical abnormalities. In addition, research indicates that children of alcoholic parents are at greater risk than other children of becoming alcoholics.
Source: National Institute on Alcohol Abuse & Addiction
Saturday, October 3, 2009
OK So Now What?
So you’re telling me I don’t have to drink. And I’m telling you fine. But if I can’t drink what am I supposed to do. Everybody I know drinks. My friends, even when we’re not “drinking” we’re drinking. That was pretty much my standard argument anytime the idea of me not drinking was brought up.
I had built a life that revolved around drinking. Whatever it was, lunch, after work, going to the game, just hanging out, having drinks was a part of it. So with that mind set it was impossible for me to visualize a life that didn’t include drinking.
My drinking became all-consuming as it took control of my life. I lost everything and drinking was my only friend. So not to drink was out of the question. With my life consumed by drinking there was no room for anything else.
So what changed? I was given a chance at sobriety. Initially the majority of my time was focused on not drinking. As I progressed in my sobriety my life also progressed towards normalcy. Rather than a life closed to everything but drinking, my sobriety offers me a life full of many wonderful opportunities.
I had built a life that revolved around drinking. Whatever it was, lunch, after work, going to the game, just hanging out, having drinks was a part of it. So with that mind set it was impossible for me to visualize a life that didn’t include drinking.
My drinking became all-consuming as it took control of my life. I lost everything and drinking was my only friend. So not to drink was out of the question. With my life consumed by drinking there was no room for anything else.
So what changed? I was given a chance at sobriety. Initially the majority of my time was focused on not drinking. As I progressed in my sobriety my life also progressed towards normalcy. Rather than a life closed to everything but drinking, my sobriety offers me a life full of many wonderful opportunities.
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